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Another ending…

 

Another semester is coming to end soon. I’m feeling troubled by the things I can’t control. System bounds everyone to a thinking space restrained with so called rules and regulations… There are many people I want to help to get them into hall but even given the rights and power to argue for them, it is still insufficient. everyoneOnce again, it can be said that the system is to be blamed for… But who creates system?



I just manage to dig out this photo that was taken last semester. That seems like a really long time back. Things aren’t really the same now… What was good then seemed different now. Maybe only when things change, then you’ll treasure the memories you left behind.



The nearer it is to exams the harder it is to focus. Recently, I had spend an hour camwhoring with JY in addition to getting hooked on other stuff like playing solitaire… Anything meaningless usually can seem like a break for me. I can’t wait for it to end yet I want more time to study. I bet everyone in hall is feeling the same I guess.

I’m starting to feel sick of staying in halls. Haven’t been going home for very long time. Missed everything back there. The home-cooked food, my bed, my TV, etc...

Met up with my brother and my mum today at Harbourfront for dinner. My brother would be enlisted on the day of my first paper so I thought I should see him again before that. I think it’s also miserable to spend a birthday in camp. He seemed like he is in a bad condition. Scars all over, no front teeth. If I was him, I would have filled with regrets over what I did to land myself in that situation. It seemed like he didn’t feel this way.


Mum told me that dad and her went to watch movies. They are not sure about the locations of the cinemas so they went to look around for quite some time. When they found it, they were told that dad could get the ticket at $4 under elderly discount category. It was then that I thought to myself that I hadn’t realise all these while when I’m growing up, time has passed so discreetly and had taken the youth out of my parents’ life too.

Now they are old enough to be considered an elderly. They are lost on where to go even in heartland areas like Ang Mo Kio. I supposed my dad is too hard on working that they hadn’t have time to take on ample leisure time to rest. It’s then that I thought that I should treasure them for all their love that they have given me to bring me to where I am.

My mum passed me a bag filled with cans of herbal tea and instant cup noodles. She knows that I’m too lazy to cook packet noodles so she put in cup noodles instead. Out came the words in Chinese, “You must know how to take care of yourself lei.” I felt touched deep inside. I didn’t think I show any expression though. It’s just not me who will show it directly. Would I have as much time to give back to them as they had for all these years?

I keep getting sore eyes. I haven’t been crying hard or doing something naughty. Oh God, please let me be well soon… Ha.